Positive Thinking

mindmastery

UNLOCK YOUR POTENTIAL

Count Your Blessings

“What is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare?”

Life unfolds in the present. As the saying goes, “The past is history, the future a mystery; the present is a gift … that’s why it’s called the present”. But we often let the moment slip by us, using up the priceless moments of our lives in pointless worrying and thinking about the past.

In today’s hectic world, most people rarely take time to just be still. Sometimes, it’s hard to let go of all the negative thoughts and find inner calm and enjoyment. Here are a few tips on how to shift your mind from possible problems to start enjoying life … in the present.

Focus on Positives

If there is nothing that you can do about the situation, then recognise that there is no point in worrying about something that is outside your control. Instead start to focus on the positive things in your life – the things that will still be there even if the worst happens. Set some time aside every day to think about the good things in your life. You may be asking, ‘What good things?’ But consider for a moment, where you would you rather be living? In Australia, with our high standard of living or in a shanty town in Africa? Almost half the world — over three billion people — live on less than $2.50 a day.

You can start to do this by keeping a ‘Gratitude Diary’. Write down at least ten things every day for which you can genuinely feel grateful – the fact that you can turn a tap and have clean water to drink; the fact that you can flip a switch and have light or heating; the fact that you live in a country where there are no wars raging around you; the fact that you have access to medical care. Sure, you may struggle to pay the bills but you are still among the privileged in this world! As you get into the habit of focusing on the positives in your life you will find that your thoughts will start to shift. When you are faced with negatives, you will think, ‘At least I still have …’

Live in the Now

Living in the moment – also called mindfulness – means that you focus your attention on the present. You allow your thoughts to just be there, without judgement. You simply observe your thoughts and acknowledge them. As you do this, you start to become aware that you are not your thoughts.

There are a few simple ways to start developing this ability. When you’re eating, do so without any distractions – no television, no computer, no reading, no conversation. Pretend you’re a professional food taster and take the time to really appreciate your food; enjoy the smell, the colours, the texture and the taste of your food. If you’re taking a shower, really feel the water on your body. Focus on the sound of the water, the smells, the feeling, the pattern of water droplets on the shower screen. If you’re walking, observe the patterns of light on buildings or trees, notice the smells, become aware of the feeling of your feet on the path and the sound of your steps.

And of course, there is the well-known method of simply focusing on your breathing.

When subjects in a study took a few minutes each day to actively savor something they usually hurried through—eating a meal, drinking a cup of tea, walking to the bus—they began experiencing more joy, happiness, and other positive emotions, and fewer depressive symptoms.

Acceptance

It is unrealistic to expect that life is always going to be full of positive experiences. The truth is that we need negative experiences to help us to fully appreciate the positives. This doesn’t mean that you have to like what’s happening nor do you need to resign yourself to it.

We all want to avoid pain and we try to resist it. We push negative thoughts and feelings away but this only makes those feelings stronger. At the same time, we start another emotional response about the first emotion. I have often worked with people who suffer from panic attacks. But they also have a secondary feeling of panic over whether they are going to have another panic attack.

For example, if you’ve lost somebody, it’s natural to feel sad. Allow that feeling to be there while acknowledging that this is a normal response and that it’s ok to feel that way. Accept that some things are beyond your control and that this is part of the rich tapestry of life. When you can do this, you’ll find that you process the feeling. When you avoid the feeling, it tends to fester beneath the surface of your awareness and to colour all your other experiences.

Surround Sounds

The sounds that surround us have a major influence on how we feel. Various studies have found that music can lower blood pressure, induce sleep and ease the symptoms of depression by as much as 25%.

And it’s not just music, the sound of birds singing actually triggers the release of a relaxation response in the brain!

.Play music to help change your mood – up-beat music can help to lift your spirits, while slow music can help you to relax.

Visualisation Techniques

Where is the most relaxing place you go to unwind? What do you do there? Who are you with? (It’s fine to be on your own!) Just take yourself there in your mind and really get inside that memory. (Or it could be an imaginary place — somewhere you would like to go.)

For example, if you enjoy going to the beach, imagine yourself lying on the sand. Be inside your body, looking through your own eyes. Feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, the texture of the sand beneath your body, the sea breeze caressing your skin. See the sun glinting on the waves — perhaps there are surfers or small boats. You can hear the sound of the surf, children playing farther along the beach, a gull flying by. You can smell the seaweed and taste the tang of the salt on your lips. Use all your senses to construct the scene and then feel yourself relaxing, just as you would if you were there in reality.

Combine this with music to really feel yourself becoming calmer.

Exercise

Exercises for relieving stress may be in the form of physical, mental, or spiritual exercise - or a combination of all three, e.g. yoga. What is good for the body is good for the mind and vice versa.

Physical exercise is one of the most effective ways of relieving stress. Getting into better shape improves your mental health as well as your physical health.

When we physically exert ourselves, the body releases chemical substances (endorphins) that are similar in nature to opiates. These natural substances produced by our own bodies are free of side effects, except for making us feel good.

When it comes to stress management, every little bit of exercise counts. Don’t think if you can’t commit to a stringent fitness routine that it’s useless. lt’s not. What motivates people to do more of something is to begin to do a little of something.

Aerobics

Any activity that gets your heart pumping (aerobic exercise) will get those endorphins flowing and relieve stress. Though you should check with your doctor before embarking on any exercise program, walking is usually safe for anyone.

Try to get your heart going a little faster for at least l5 minutes a day. Even a few minutes here and there of brisk walking can provide stress relief and improve your overall health.

Exercise in a Natural Environment for Additional Stress Relieving Benefits

Obviously it is more relaxing to walk along a nature trail than to walk along a busy street. Natural surroundings trigger relaxation responses deep in the brain. Even mentally picturing being surrounded by mountains, trees or watching the waves roll in at the beach can have this calming effect. (See Visualisation Techniques)

Exposure to daylight also has positive effects on mood - another benefit of exercising outdoors.

Stretching

Stretching exercises stimulate receptors in the nervous system that decrease the production of stress hormones. Stretching exercises also relax tight, tense muscles and increase blood flow.

Yoga

Yoga exercises involve the body, mind and spirit. Yoga poses improve flexibility and strength, incorporating breathing techniques that aid in relaxation and general wellness.

Indulge Yourself

On the days you don't exercise, do something else you find relaxing — have some

massage therapy, soak away stress in a soothing aromatherapy bath, etc.

Make Time

All too often, I hear clients and friends saying ‘But I don’t have the time …’ Most of the above tips only take a few minutes and can easily be incorporated into your day. So try them and notice the difference in your life!

WHAT is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare?—

No time to stand beneath the boughs,

And stare as long as sheep and cows:

No time to see, when woods we pass,

Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:

No time to see, in broad daylight,

Streams full of stars, like skies at night:

No time to turn at Beauty's glance,

And watch her feet, how they can dance:

No time to wait till her mouth can

Enrich that smile her eyes began?